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Is suicide the answer, a way out, a bargaining chip...what?

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Is suicide the answer, a way out, a bargaining chip...what? Empty Is suicide the answer, a way out, a bargaining chip...what?

Post by Breezey Breezey Thu Jul 29, 2010 7:35 am

Some commit suicide without a word, others keep saying they'll commit suicide every time something goes wrong and others never see suicide as an option.

Is there really any way to know who is "honestly" contemplating suicide?
Breezey Breezey
Breezey Breezey
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Join date : 2010-02-13

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Post by Ja'aj Thu Jul 29, 2010 10:42 am

I'm sure it has been all of those thing at one time or another.

There is no way to be "sure" until someone succeeds.
It is always a good idea to take the threat seriously.
Particularly from the depressed and children.
Teens especially - hormones on the fritz and everything is the
end of the world - need to be heeded.
Ja'aj
Ja'aj
WITCH!
WITCH!

Join date : 2010-02-17

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Post by Breezey Breezey Thu Jul 29, 2010 10:49 am

Hard to tell with adults who cry wolf every time they screw something up and have a mess to clean up. Seems like a bartering chip then and done to make others feel obligated to fix the mess again and again and again.
Breezey Breezey
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Post by Ja'aj Thu Jul 29, 2010 11:36 am

I know the "type" -well. (Michael had a girlfriend... [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.])

Walk away. ADULTS make their own decisions.
If the person is not mentally ill... then it's their call, isn't it?

That crap! really! pisses me off. I've been in and out
and around with hospitals, friends, blah-blah-blah...
I had one "bout" with suicidal - YEARS AGO - and before I knew
what-the-HELL! was wrong with me.
For me - I said NOTHING to anyone. I worked on it for a long time-
(I had a child, so I knew I'd have to make it look accidental -
no guilt for the survivors.)
And no childish "and THEN you'll be sorry!" from me .
I figured out how childish that! is a long time ago!
"And even if they ARE...how will that help you? It's not like you
can come BACK, is it?" (morons and children do that)
Anyway, by the time I figured out HOW and realized that with my luck
I'd probably just end up in a wheelchair ... [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
I decided that planning a suicide s definitely as bad! as it gets.
AND... since you can always DO that - ONCE... might as well hang around
and see what happens next.

"People" who whine and threaten that crap ! every time they don't get
their own way... REALLY!! piss me off.
I finally asked Leslie (Michael's GF) how she planned to DO this?
She wasn't high-enough to jump from her patio/balcony - maybe sprain an ankle... no blood for Jason to come home to find (tacky!) so... what?
As far as I'm concerned this! was the "tell"
She stopped looking woebegone, straightened up; looked me dead in
the eye and said,
"You really don't like me, do you?"
[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
Ja'aj
Ja'aj
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WITCH!

Join date : 2010-02-17

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Post by Ja'aj Thu Jul 29, 2010 11:40 am

P.S.
That was a VERY long time ago for me.
(More recently for Leslie... [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] )

I've never -EVER!- been suicidal again.
Why do that and give sooo many people so much satisfaction? [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
I am, however, frequently (mildly) homicidal. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
Ja'aj
Ja'aj
WITCH!
WITCH!

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Post by Ja'aj Thu Jul 29, 2010 11:47 am

I do know these two things...
"People who threaten suicide don't do it" is a myth -they do.

And, if someone you know is depressed - whether or not! they talk
about suicide - and they suddenly cheer up! with no apparent reason...
the chances are excellent that they've made a decision and it
has lightened their burden. NOW they have a way out. YIKES!
Also -
People who suddenly begin giving away things that are precious to them?
They need to be watched and TALKED to about it. Fast. GET THEM HELP.
Ja'aj
Ja'aj
WITCH!
WITCH!

Join date : 2010-02-17

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Post by Breezey Breezey Thu Jul 29, 2010 12:12 pm

Ja'aj... one person in particular.. I don't see going anywhere soon. This has been going on for over ten years. As of now, the person has accumulated so much crap that storage sheds are now being used and still.. refusal to part with any of it, even for a price. Doom and gloom could be the middle name for this person cuz that's all we ever hear! UNLESS... we'd like to hand over money or free help.
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Post by Breezey Breezey Thu Jul 29, 2010 12:13 pm

I am really sorry you ever felt that way. (((Ja'aj)))
I'm glad you stuck around. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
Breezey Breezey
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Post by Ja'aj Thu Jul 29, 2010 1:50 pm

Breezey Breezey wrote:Ja'aj... one person in particular.. I don't see going anywhere soon. This has been going on for over ten years. As of now, the person has accumulated so much crap that storage sheds are now being used and still.. refusal to part with any of it, even for a price. Doom and gloom could be the middle name for this person cuz that's all we ever hear! UNLESS... we'd like to hand over money or free help.


Ah. THAT type. God love the users of the world...
I don't know the person...
It makes me think of Drew Carey's character -
his girlfriend's Mom kept saying she's be dead soon.
The 2nd or 3rd time the woman said that to Carey he said,
"Mother Whoever, I'm beginning to think you're all talk."
( [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] Promises. promises...)

I "think" (given my degree in "shrink"and all)
they will likely outlive everyone - barring physical illness or accident.
Certainly it seems they are not likely to do themselves intentional injury.

The hoarding is a different illness. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
Recommend a good therapist - or a bad one.
Most of us are not! qualified to cope with that one.
It requires proper training.

Walk away.
You and everyone else this person bullies and browbeats are
entitled to your own lives; free from oppression.
(I really despise blackmailers - "and then you'll be sorry!")
Yeah? Let's find out. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]


There is an enormous difference between those who
are genuinely sad; those who are angling to get attention or
their own way - and this person you describe.
"USER! - Selfish Self-Centered USER!" comes to mind, [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
and is, I believe, the correct clinical term.
Ja'aj
Ja'aj
WITCH!
WITCH!

Join date : 2010-02-17

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Post by Ja'aj Thu Jul 29, 2010 2:13 pm

Breezey Breezey wrote:I am really sorry you ever felt that way. (((Ja'aj)))
I'm glad you stuck around. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]


I'm happy to hear it! Me too.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

( It was "odd" - nothing was WRONG!- certainly not THAT wrong -)
And I'm serious - once I figured out that -for me anyway-
it was as bad as it could get and I would always have that to
fall back on (so to speak [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]) - then I decided I might as well wait and
see what happened next.
I've been serious; I have friends who were all-but-dead! serious.
I have a friend with inch-high WELTS! for scars
-with cross-dents where the tread to stitch them closed was embedded-
that run the length of her wrist to mid-forearm and a three inch cross-wise WELT/SCAR across the inside of her elbow.
Frannie meant! to kill herself. She cut DEEP and she knew where and how.

People who threaten me with it get short shrift and no patience from me.
Ja'aj
Ja'aj
WITCH!
WITCH!

Join date : 2010-02-17

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Post by Tater Salad Thu Jul 29, 2010 3:08 pm

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
Tater Salad
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Post by Ja'aj Thu Jul 29, 2010 6:09 pm

Tater Salad wrote:Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

It IS... if you're a kid...
Ja'aj
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Post by Tater Salad Fri Jul 30, 2010 10:36 pm

Does that mean it isn't, if you're an adult?
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Post by Breezey Breezey Sat Jul 31, 2010 4:06 am

Tater Salad wrote:Does that mean it isn't, if you're an adult?

I think it can be for any age and find a person's character very lacking when something this serious seems like a way to get people to do things their way or used as a scare tactic.
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Post by Ja'aj Sat Jul 31, 2010 5:05 am

Tater Salad wrote:Does that mean it isn't, if you're an adult?
\

Tater, [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
Yes. Sometimes whatever the problem is isn't 'temporary'.
Sometimes a suicide is the result of staring down the barrel of a
long illness that will have an ugly, painful death.
Some suicides like that I understand.
Ernest Hemingway's was the first one I knew of that made
absolute sense to me -given who he was, how he lived his life,
and he not wanting to 'ride out' stomach cancer.

I understand the chicken-sh!t suicide killers too.

I have no sympathy, but get it, unlike teenagers who are one rampant
screwed-up hormone, and everything is the the end of their existence!
It's just so damned sad when we know! that in most instances if they gave -whatever- 6 months it won't even make the list of
"The 10 Worst Things To Happen To Me This Year."
And the little kids who haven't thought much of anything! through yet.
Ja'aj
Ja'aj
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WITCH!

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Post by Ja'aj Sat Jul 31, 2010 5:17 am

"I think it can be for any age and find a person's character very
lacking when something this serious seems like a way to get people to
do things their way or used as a scare tactic."

YEAH! I just want to SLAP! them!
Also the self-pity/"pay attention to meee" crap.
After seemingly endless "there-there"... I kinda want to offer
them my Mossberg.
"Your call; put up or shut! up." [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] Geez. Blackmail gets "who cares", after awhile.
Even if! (and one doubts it) everyone is 'sorry'... how will that help them?
Like Molly said, "Well, don't bleed on the rug, I just shampooed it."
Ja'aj
Ja'aj
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